Adventures on Muni

Crazy Lady (to the guy standing near her): I hate your shirt! Ha ha!
Shirt Guy: … Oh—okay.
Crazy Lady: You smell like patchouli and summer and piss!
Shirt Guy: …I’m sorry?
Crazy Lady: I smell like love!
[…]
Crazy Lady (to the guy sitting next to her): You’re soft! Can I lay on you?
Soft Guy: What? Oh. Um…
Crazy Lady: I’ve got a piece of your leather! It’s soft! That’s why you’re soft! You make me feel good!
Soft Guy: Well, I’m glad I make someone feel good.
Crazy Lady: You smell good too! I think I’m in love! Are you married?
Soft Guy: Um… yeah.
Crazy Lady: Oh, that’s too bad. You can be my bus husband though! And then, when you get on the bus I can say “Hi husband!” and you can say “Hey, what’s up wife?”!
Soft Guy: Oh, you can just call me Ken.
Crazy Lady: Ken? Ha ha! I’m Barbie! Ha ha! No, I’m just kidding! I’m Midge! They always took the blonde barbies and made me play with Midge. But ha ha! That’s how I like it anyway! We’re not the ugly ones! I’m Midge!